Greetings dreamers, lovers, friends, family & strangers alike!! I’m BACK!!! I must admit I’m slightly ashamed to face you all after so long, an even longer hiatus than before. With the more than 1 year away, all I can tell you is that I fell into this realm of writers block that lasted up until now. Not wanting to come out of it, Kinda relishing in this cocoon of mine was a stark reminder of that very loneliness brought on by the pandemic. I felt safe there…. Non-judged, nothing to explain to anyone, just relishing in myself & my thoughts. However, lately I have felt the urge to move out of that shell & into the world filled of pomp & circumstance, to be apart of it with my story in tow. Like an epiphany has hit me & the words came. No longer did they hide, stifled in my mind & heart. Instead they poured forth like liquid from a tap. Sure I’ve posted on social media, pictures & FB status’ & such but not like this. Deeper, longer tasking heartfelt writing & all because I yearned the need for subtlety. Generally I’m a quiet woman… I address things with simplicity & move forward which is why I can’t see how these tiktokers & bloggers do it on a daily basis. On the contrary, I want to be like them; more open & available in order to complete such a task. It’s a good feeling. A warm one that is so comforting, familiar even. I feel honestly euphoric in a sense that’s gitty & dazed as the words present itself…So let’s start now…
Well so much has happened since my last entry that per usual, I’ve no idea where to start… Let’s see…There’s been more school shootings, we were in a PANDEMIC!! Technically we still are, however we’ve past the hard part; the BEGINNING & most importantly tRUMP lost reelection!!!! And on 12/24/2020 I turned 40!!! Couldn’t celebrate like I really wanted to with the whole world under shutdown, so just a quiet evening of Birthday cake, Champaign & those I love sufficed quite nicely…
So about this PANDEMIC…An airborne virus called COVID -19 aka Coronavirus ravaged our nation. many lives were lost & forever changed as scientists worked around the clock to find a cure. We were forced to wear masks in an attempt to decrease the spread, tools not to engage in large crowds & to stay home! One by one mayor’s were closing down public places such as nightclubs & museums, dine-in restaurants only allowing essential places to remain open such as grocery stores & pharmacies. Hospital staff overwhelmed, ICU docs being intubated by their colleagues after catching the virus. PPE running low, some places reporting to have reused masks & gowns. Different states were creating tents & large capacity buildings made into temporary makeshift hospitals, literally running out of beds & respiratory ventilators. Nursing homes shut down of visitors, hospitals too canceling ALL visits. Airports became ghost towns, flights were dirt cheap & planes operating at about 1/2 capacity. It was as if the world just STOPPED…or moved back in time ans we became living rather primitive lives. And for some people, that wasn’t an easy task to live with.
The Isolation…
The pandemic caused a major wave of isolation for many people & depending on who you were & your homelife, it was devastating for some. I read how some looked forward to the home visits hospitals were offering to give the vaccine. Just seeing how that human connection was missed & needed was most assuredly taken advantage of. People with disabilities & the elderly, who were considered “The vulnerable” were at a major impasse. Being left alone & many left to fend for themselves made 411 & crisis center hotlines overrun, statistics showing calls coming in in droves at more than 3x that in a years time. While I do live alone, I was fortunate to still have the support of my family. They were merely a phone call away for food, medicines & anything else I needed. So to be truly honest, I never really knew the true meaning of isolation during this time. Now boredom is quite another matter. Normally I always had something to do, however this time I yearned these activities; paint, bead, sketch, write, Netflix, reading a book, listen to music, finding new podcasts, putting outfits together [I LOVE fashion] talking to myself, talking on the phone, matching old pieces with the new in my closet, going on dates in my head etc but when you get tired of those things, the boredom creeps in, soon realizing that this is all that’s left to do. The world was so guarded & shutdown that I began looking forward to going to doctors appointments just to get out of the confines of home! Even they were practicing social distancing that you were unable to bring someone to your appointment with you. That must’ve been difficult for those needing a companion or personal assistant, yet again another obstacle for the elderly & disabled. It wasn’t until after my weekly Women’s group began over the phone that it sunk in & everything went VIRTUAL. And being a person with a disability, I’m sure I wasn’t the only one like me feeling this way. Can you imagine the mental breakdown from that isolation? The deterioration that erupted from a day in-day out new “ normal” as a direct result of the pandemic was major. So I stayed in contact with my closest friends on the phone & that helped keep the boredom at a distance. But a part of me couldn’t help wonder “What about others like me, how are they holding up? Do they have friends to call, family to pray with?” No. Another stark reality. I would add those people in my prayers at night. It was important to keep these people in my heart because I knew that this time wasn’t easy. I can safely say that I’m pretty well adjusted, it rattled my brain knowing that some did not share this attribute. I watched as the world became a different place right before my eyes… Students were out of school & eventually moved to Virtual Learning. It was a long, DARK & unsure time for us all & those in office [White House] who are supposed to reassure us a solution was on the way, had NO IDEA whether scratch their watch or wind their BUTTS!! I rejoice knowing that NIGHTMARE is a thing of the past as we move forward…
A Vaccine, A Way Out
Fast-forward to December 2021, my luck finally runs out & I get COVID!! Even after my 2-shot vaccine & booster, my lucky streak seemed no match for the inevitable. I caught it on my Birthday, the worst gift I ever gotten that didn’t come with a gift receipt for easy exchange. Just when I thought Life couldn’t get any worse, I end up on the COVID ward with 2 fractured ribs… No matter, I managed to get through it as I’ve always done. Coughing during the first onset led to the most severe sore throat as if I swallowed a porcupine was no good start to the new year. Nonetheless, it was all over. It sits on my shelf as a thing of the past, awaiting more memories to join.
While the Vaccine has served as a life raft for some, those that were lost in the battle will remain etched in our memories as we move forward. To this day, people are still suffering from COVID, some living with residual symptoms from the diagnosis. They must manage life under new circumstances & conditions that never existed before, all the while dodging a second & often third diagnosis, vaccinated & all. The world is now open for business again, with some COVID restrictions were applicable yet still recovering from 18 months of lockdown. The days of fights in isle 9 over the last roll of paper towels are a thing of the past. Many who witnessed a pandemic of the 21st century can safely say “What a time to have been alive” 🤗
Per usual, read, share & COMMENT!! I hope this message finds you well:)
